Moscow Museums with Karen

A brief introduction... I'm an American woman of notably un-notable roots. I grew up a child of the poor white farmers Willie Nelson sang about, in the precise geographical center of the USA. All my years in nearly total agrarian isolation left me with a voracious fear of geographical commitment, nonetheless resulting in self-inflicted "army-brat" syndrome during adulthood, i.e. a complete inability to stay in any location for longer than a year. Following a tortured six-year purgatorial stint at university, I exploded all over the earth, a trek which eventually led me here, to Moscow.

At university I studied art and art history. I would flatter myself to suggest that I am anything resembling an art connoisseur. However, I do love exhibits, galleries and museums. I also like knowing how easy it is to access the bathrooms there, how much admission costs, how long the entrance line will be, how crowded it's going to be, can I buy coffee there and if it's even worth it, especially on a precious Saturday afternoon. So, for anyone out there that may want to know what to expect when visiting an art museum, exhibit or gallery here, I hope to assist you.

Last Saturday I visited the Pushkin Museum located at Kropokinskaya Metro station on the red line. Despite the rain, the line to get in the museum curved around the entire block. The timing of those let enter (approximately fifteen people every twenty minutes) was eerily similar to the "face control" lines at Fabrique, but after an hour's wait, I got in. The museum admission cost 240 rubles, and the "facing" by the security guards was well appreciated once inside. The museum felt quite airy and comfortable, not at all like the stuffed and aggressive atmospheres of other museums in Europe where, for example, you need pepper spray to get to the "Mona Lisa."

Once inside, I headed directly for the Schliemann exhibit of "Troy" (well, not really "Troy" but he didn't know that). The exhibit showed up at the Pushkin after a fifty-year post-WWII absence from it's original home in Berlin. This story is almost more interesting than the exhibit itself. I was disappointed to notice the exclusion of "The Mask of Agamemnon," perhaps one of the most well known artifacts from Schliemann's excavation. It currently resides at the Athens National Museum. So, for any of you that were geeky enough to watch the entire BBC documentary "In Search of Troy," the ferocious golden mask so dramatically flashed for theatrical emphasis isn't here in Moscow. What you will find though are other gold headpieces and some bracelets, earrings, etc...

By far the most impressive of all the museum's exhibits are its selection of paintings, starting from my favorite (and by far unique to the Pushkin), the Fayoum Portraits from Coptic Egypt. The painting selection just keeps kicking, with an impressive display of Dutch and Italian masters. The Impressionists and Post Modernists are in full form too, with some fantastic paintings by Matisse, Picasso, Gauguin and Van Gogh.

The titles of displays and paintings are all labeled in English, with years and time-periods easy enough to read. This won't be an issue, as long as you aren't wanting anything beyond that. All other info is in Russian, but you can rent a guided cassette tour at the entrance for specifics.

One drawback, of the "impressive" sculpture collection, almost all are plaster copies. Hence, rather than ponder the master carving on the marble (not) bust of Marcus Aurelius, I could hardly suppress an urge to scratch the plaster with my finger, just like I did with my own creations in Sculpture 101. Under the titles, and if you can read a little Russian, you can find the location of the originals. But, Russians seem to be mad over replicas (e.g. "Christ the Saviour Cathedral") so maybe I'm just a party-pooper. Regardless, the sculptures are massive in amounts and visually impressive despite their unoriginality.

Of creature comforts... the bathrooms are sparkling clean and there is never a line. Due to poor funding, certain areas of the museum were FREEZING, so it may be wise to NOT check your coat. There is a cafeteria so food and coffee are options, but I'm unsure how much it costs. There's plenty of places to take breaks during mid-museum burnout. As I said above, the museum is surprisingly uncrowded, so you won't have to hoist a giggly teenager on a forced school excursion to find somewhere quiet to sit.

All in all, it is one of Europe's preeminent museums, so you'd be kind of a fool to not visit it. So, plan for a little discomfort. But, once you see some of the displays or paintings you'll forget all about life's excruciating mundanity, if even for a second. Well worth 240 rubles.